Dear Ash…

Unknown-2Hey everyone!  Today I’m answering emails in blogs, as this one raised a phenomenal question:

Sorry Ash,
Cat jumped onto phone!

As I was saying, they had a screaming match for hours over porn she had found in the history on their laptop.

A tired me this morning when my alarm went off at 04:15 for my run still went out and I’m thinking.  My opinion of any couple watching porn is a good thing.  If he’s watching it and having a wank he’s not putting it into another woman.  I think a lot of women should take their heads from up their arse’s and broaden their horizons.  It can put the umph into a relationship, i.e. your tired, not in the mood.  Watch porn get in the mood!

Neil and we’re only saying the other weekend, if I hadn’t come across you where would our marriage be?  I’m the one that wrote you the embarrassing e-mail that our sex life had blossomed finding you, I was finding sex difficult due to injuries.

My hours run flies by and I’m none the wiser.  It’s only acting, just like watching a soap.  Can you shed any light on why women are so threatened by porn?

Lucy Lou apologizes for jumping on first e-mail.

Take care Maria

Shout out to fellow kitties!  So onto answer Maria’s question – Why are women so threatened by porn, and what my opinion is on this matters…

Shockingly enough before I was in porn I had similar qualms to my partners watching porn.  It made me feel insignificant and like I wasn’t good enough to satisfy their sexual needs.  I knew that porn performers were willing to do things in the bedroom that, at the time, I wasn’t willing to open myself up to.  I felt that within the fantasy of this sexually liberated woman, if her and I stood next to each other that my partner would choose them.  It was insecure and naive of me.

I fully agree with Maria’s opinion that porn can work as a sexual friend in a relationship instead of a foe.  Also very true that if your partner is satisfying themselves to porn, that they’re not going out and cheating.  Porn is highly visually stimulating and in the case of Maria and Neil they found me as their outlet to hold their marriage together and enjoy me TOGETHER.

Now if you are a woman struggling with your partners attention and things in the bed have lost their spark, I recommend couples porn (romance based porn) and a romantic night with some candles and lingerie to spice things up.  If the option of watching porn is put into the woman’s hands who would otherwise feel threatened by it, it can become a powerful tool and a great surprise to their partner.  They have now chosen the girl/video to bring into their bedroom and the “dirty secret” their partner had on their own is now shared, which opens many pleasurable doors.

These videos can be used for not only visual stimulation to get the gears turning again, but also inspiration in role playing.  This is another great way to keep things interesting because in role playing a person is temporarily stepping out of their skin and their hesitations to become someone else.  Costumes also fall under this and are a great way to get into character!

Remember ladies, mine and other porn performers have a second identity and that is the one you see on camera.  We are regular women just like you reading this and we have our same hang ups about our bodies, appearances, and even our sex lives.  So before you think were some kind of evil sexual super villain… We’re not.  We put our bras on just like you!

I hope this helps answer Maria’s question and any others who had the same.  Remember you can always send an email on my site to be answered as well! If any of you have Surius XM radio, catch me discussing this subject on Vivid Radio XM 102 on my show “Tap That Ash” which airs Monday and Tuesday 8pm east 5pm west. Cheers!

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By |2016-10-15T07:23:06+00:00April 3rd, 2014|Categories: blog|Tags: , , , |2 Comments